Here’s the truth: Happiness could only be found through
others. You can’t find it on your own, you cannot create it on your own—it is
always a collective effort and a hard one at that. It is an emotion, a
perspective, a moment that will subdue in a second. And even though you give
your best shot at it, you just can’t be happy without accounting it to a
memory, an experience or a person.
I’m walking on a thin ice whilst talking about happiness.
It as a concept and an end result of a long process is elusive and confusing.
It cannot be talked about without the feeling of being lost in translation or
senselessness. But still, I want to talk or rather, write about it, while I
have the luxury of time to do so.
Back on the claim at hand: happiness is not an action to be
made solely, but by people of all kinds and shapes. And one more thing:
oftentimes, if not always, you become happy when you see that others are happy.
A joke, an accomplishment, a helping hand—any related action that could be done
by you can elicit happiness (or any related positive action) from the group you
are a member of. And such reaction is a validation that can bring a sense of
fulfillment in your part, thus making you happy and light hearted. It’s simple
logic, really—they’re happy, you’re happy, what could possibly go wrong?
I say: many things could go wrong. For one, your life could
be forever screwed because of your obsession to this kind of happiness.
Again, it’s really simple: the road to happiness is never
cemented and fully asphalted. This road has its gregarious bumps and unforeseen
holes and all kinds of unfinished business. The journey to this is painful and
involves buckets of tears and weeping. On this road, you’ll meet a lot of
people who are necessary, while others are not. Still, you’ll feel grateful to
have met all of them. With a semi-detached disposition, you get to know them
and leave traces of you as you go from place to place. This journey involves a
lot of introspection, self-discovery and growth. It will be a difficult process—you’ll
meet and leave a lot of people, you’ll hurt yourself and them—but it will be
worth it.
Then there’s the other road to happiness: the one which is
smooth as a baby’s bum. You just walk across it and feel jovial all the same.
On this road, you’ll meet a lot of people who will be relying on you
relentlessly. They will welcome you and make you feel at home in this place
called Earth. They will take care of you, nourish, guide and love you. You’ll
claim that the little spot (called the Comfort Zone) they created on this world
as your sole Home, and you won’t want to get out of that. Soon enough, you will devote yourself to them.
Their happiness will be your only source of happiness.
At this point in my
life, I can truly say that I am on the second road. An obedient child, I couldn’t
say no to my parents. I rarely lie to them because I JUST CAN”T. I don’t know
how to and I never want to. I always follow what they want me to do even after I
graduated from college. At first I was happy and I felt as high as someone on
space brownie, but now it seems I realized that I’ve taken the wrong path and I
want a way out.
Am I being selfish? That is another question for some other
time.
Now, I just want to create a diversion, to go back to the
beginning of the road so I can take the first one.
If you were I, which road will you choose?
